Overcoming Fear and Anxiety

Overcoming Fear and Anxiety: Why “Praying It Away” Isn’t Enough Anymore

The Silent Pandemic Nigeria Refuses to Acknowledge

In Nigeria, we don’t talk about fear and anxiety. Not really.
We downplay it with jokes. We hide it behind Bible verses. We mask it with loud music, fake smiles, and endless hustle. And when it gets too heavy?

“You’re not praying enough.”
“Just snap out of it.”
“You need deliverance.”

Let’s be clear: Fear and anxiety are real, and they’re silently destroying lives. They don’t care if you live in Lekki or Lafia, drive a Benz or a keke. And yet, our cultural response remains stuck in the Stone Age.

This article is not your typical motivational pep talk. It’s a controversial, brutally honest deep dive into how fear and anxiety affect Nigerians and what it actually takes to overcome them in 2025.

1. Fear and Anxiety in Nigeria: The Invisible Chains

Let’s break it down.

Fear is that tight knot in your chest when you think about the unknown — job loss, marriage delay, poverty, failure.

Anxiety is the sleepless night before a job interview, the panic in traffic when NEPA cuts light, the trembling before sharing your opinion in church or a meeting.

Now mix that with:

Constant insecurity
Financial instability
Social judgment
Religious guilt

And what do you get? A society paralyzed by invisible battles.

Controversial Truth: Fear and anxiety aren’t Western problems. They’re Nigerian problems too — we’re just too proud to admit it.

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2. Why “Faith Alone” Isn’t Always the Fix

Don’t get it twisted faith is powerful. Many Nigerians survive only because they believe in something greater than themselves.

But here’s the problem: we often use faith to bypass emotional honesty.

Instead of therapy, we say, “Just pray.”
Instead of listening, we say, “It is well.”
Instead of healing, we spiritualize trauma.

It’s not that God can’t heal anxiety it’s that God also gave us tools: therapists, support groups, breathing techniques, medication, awareness.

Faith without mental health education is not healing — it’s denial dressed in church clothes.

3. The Cultural Lies We Tell Ourselves

Nigerian culture reinforces anxiety with harmful beliefs:

“Men don’t cry.” So boys grow up emotionally numb.
“Strong women don’t fear.” So women suppress their struggles.
“Only mad people go to therapy.” So everyone suffers in silence.

These myths are killing us.

We’ve turned emotional suppression into a badge of honor. We think being “fearless” means ignoring fear. But fear doesn’t go away when ignored it grows louder.

The result? Depression masked as silence. Panic attacks in church pews. Suicide notes buried in WhatsApp drafts.

4. Fear as a Political Weapon: How Nigeria Keeps You Afraid

Fear isn’t just personal. In Nigeria, it’s political currency.

Fear of speaking out against corruption.
Fear of bandits, SARS, kidnappers.
Fear of losing your job if you protest.
Fear of disappointing your family.

Governments and institutions rely on fear to maintain control. And so, anxiety becomes not just a personal issue but a collective symptom of systemic failure.

Controversial View: Some leaders want you afraid. An anxious population is easier to manipulate than an emotionally intelligent one.

5. So What Does “Overcoming” Fear Really Mean?

Let’s get real. You won’t overcome fear by pretending it doesn’t exist. You overcome fear by:

Understanding it
Facing it strategically
Building tools to manage it

Here are unpopular but effective ways Nigerians can begin that process:

a. Name Your Fear Without Shame

Stop calling it “overthinking.” Start saying the word: anxiety.
It’s not weakness. It’s self-awareness.

b. Start Small Exposure Practices

Afraid of public speaking? Start with voice notes.
Afraid of crowds? Attend small gatherings.
Afraid of failing? Do one thing badly and survive it.

Progress starts with exposure, not avoidance.

c. Get Therapy Yes, Even in Nigeria

Online therapists, WhatsApp-based counselors, local professionals. They’re out there. You don’t need to be “mad” to go to therapy you just need to be human.

Platforms like:

Mentally Aware Nigeria
She Writes Woman
Mind and Mentality Africa

Are creating safe spaces for mental healing.

d. Ditch Toxic Motivation

“You’re lazy.”
“Just do it.”
“You’re not trying hard enough.”

This kind of talk makes anxiety worse. Replace shame with compassionate discipline.

e. Practice Daily Regulation (Not Random Motivation)

Fear is biological. So your body needs regular tools to manage it:

Breathwork
Meditation
Grounding techniques
Sleep hygiene
Journaling

These aren’t “oyinbo habits.” They’re basic survival tools.

6. Why Most Productivity Advice in Nigeria Doesn’t Work

You’ve seen the reels:
Wake up at 5 AM.
Drink lemon water.
Write 10 goals.

Sounds great until NEPA takes light, your boss starts shouting, and traffic eats 4 hours of your life.

Productivity advice that ignores Nigerian realities is harmful. You can’t hack your fear with a foreign routine. What we need is contextual coping.

Real productivity is learning how to work with your fear — not pretending it doesn’t exist.

7. The Role of Family: Help or Harm?

Let’s be honest many Nigerian families are anxiety factories.

They love you, yes. But they also:

Compare you constantly
Demand perfection
Dismiss your emotions
Use fear to control your choices

If you say, “I’m feeling anxious,” they’ll say, “You think you’re the first?”

But family can also be healing if they unlearn and listen.

Tip: Set boundaries. Share resources. Invite conversations. But also accept that healing may mean distance.

8. Can You Be Successful and Anxious? YES — Here’s How

Success doesn’t mean fear-free. Many successful Nigerians battle anxiety every day.

From entertainers to CEOs to pastors — fear is a constant visitor. The difference? They learned to manage it, not be controlled by it.

Here’s what they do differently:

Accept that anxiety is part of the process.
Build mental health routines like they build business plans.
Ask for help.
Take breaks before breakdowns.

You can be anxious and still give a TED Talk. Still close that deal. Still raise a family. Still build a life that matters.

9. What the Church and Mosque Need to Do Better

Religion plays a huge role in Nigerian life and it can be either a balm or a burden.

It helps when it:

Encourages therapy
Creates safe spaces for mental struggles
Supports medical interventions where necessary

It hurts when it:

Labels anxiety as sin
Shames people for “lack of faith”
Promotes fasting over emotional intelligence

We don’t need less God we need more grace.

Healing is not disobedience. Taking medication isn’t demonic. Resting is not rebellion.

10. Your Fear Doesn’t Disqualify You

If you take nothing else from this article, take this:
You are not broken. You are not weak. You are not less Nigerian because you feel fear.

The real courage isn’t in pretending you have none.
The real courage is in waking up every day, choosing to try again, to love again, to build again — even with trembling hands.